How to tell a great fish story

The only thing better than a good fish is a good fish story, which is all true, or at least mostly true, or possibly just based on a true story. But the point is that they are glorious.

To this end, a good fish story must have an amazing beginning on a pleasant day. But not just a pleasant day — a dazzling day, with the sun sparkling, or mist rising, or trout leaping.

Then they must tell of the struggle. Long hours. Hot sun. No bites. No bait. Bad rod. Cheap rod. No more time. Pick one.

Next comes hope and prayer. A fish under a rock. Baiting the hook with a hot dog.

And finally, Bam! It hits. The line breaks. You dive in. You grab it by the tail. It’s massive. It’s powerful. It’s a miracle.

Now the picture.

Hold the fish by the head and tail while extending your arms out straight to the camera. It’s a big fish, and it looks all the bigger this way because this is a fish tale, but it’s based on a true story.

Don’t kiss a fish
Strange things have happened between man and fish. In 2017, a man in Bournemouth, England, caught a six-inch Dover sole. In the tradition of the area, he bent down to kiss it. That’s when the fish wriggled free and dove into his mouth. It got stuck in his windpipe.

There’s no doubt about the fish in the windpipe. Paramedics had to extract it when the man went into cardiac arrest, according to the Guardian.