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New Year’s Resolutions: Break out into something new

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So, everyone resolves to lose weight and stop procrastinating. Why stick with the obvious? Here are some resolutions that will make 2018 a little more interesting.

1.  Master some jokes. Why resolve to be more social if you don’t know what to do when you get to the party? Try to find a selection of one-liners that will work in a variety of situations. Find a longish joke that will be suitable to tell at lunch with a friend. Maybe a spicy joke to tell a really good friend. But always have a sweet joke to tell someone’s mother.

2.  Learn a useful phrase in three languages. Hey, you want to be debonair? Here’s your chance. Go for Arabic and Mandarin if you are adventurous. If you want laughs, learn something silly. With one resolution, you tick off ‘learn something new.’ Done.

3.  Learn to juggle. A good party trick that will get everyone else involved and keep you busy while listening to YouTube videos. Hey, you aren’t wasting time.

4.  Give yourself a big win. The problem with New Year’s resolutions is that only 8 percent of resolvers keep their resolutions. That leaves 92 percent feeling like failures. They are resolving the wrong things. Instead, try something that you have a good chance of accomplishing:
– Always drink beer during a football game. If you break this resolution, you’ve probably quit drinking. Win.
– Spend more money on fun. If you break this resolution, you are saving more money.
– Never buy another organizational basket. So, if you do break down, you are getting organized.
– Never go to a gym. No sweat. But if you find yourself sweating, more’s all the better.
– Never become a circus acrobat. Unless you are one now, this is a resolution you can keep.

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