A Completely Neutral Response From Someone Who Was Not Invited to Dance

Update: June 25, 2026, 12:10 PM
The situation has escalated.

Shortly after this letter was published, my pastor called and invited me to be his plus-one.

Unfortunately, I had already purchased my own ticket and credited his team with the fundraising support, which means I have now both funded the mission and accidentally declined pastoral disco escort services.

I am not sure where this falls theologically, but I believe it counts as giving twice.

The disco continues to be monitored.

For the children.

Thanks again,

Lewis Moten

I read Sue Laurence’s letter about the Second Annual Dueling Disco Event with great interest, by which I mean I read it once, felt personally attacked by the word “dance,” then read it again for legal purposes.

Apparently, this Saturday, June 27, from 6 to 10 pm, the Hike Kidz Foundation and Jean’s Jewelers will co-host the Second Annual Dueling Disco Event at the Shenandoah Valley Golf Club.

That is fine.

People are allowed to hold fundraisers, help children, give away vehicles, wear sequins, and enjoy themselves in public.

I simply note, for the record, that some people were asked to help.

Others were not.

Again, I am not upset.

I have accepted this with the quiet dignity of a man standing outside Mac’s Roller Rink in a leisure suit and dress shoes, pretending he never wanted to skate.

Sue compared helping with the event to walking into NASA on launch day. I have actually worked with NASA, and that is not how NASA works. NASA is mostly red tape, delays, meetings about earlier meetings, and angry generals copied on escalated email threads.

The phrase around NASA is, “It’s only rocket science.”

And that is fair.

Rocket science follows known laws of physics. Disco does not.

Disco involves music, sequins, confidence, lighting, timing, emotional risk, and the horrifying possibility that someone might point at you and yell, “Go ahead, Lewie!”

No engineer can prepare for that.

Still, I could have helped. I could have carried something. I have arms. Not professional arms. Not toned arms. Not arms anyone would specifically request by name. But arms nevertheless.

I also have big, strong hands, which, as anyone familiar with emotionally devastating 1980s fantasy films knows, do not always make one useful in a crisis. Still, I believe they could have managed a box of raffle tickets, a stack of programs, or one reasonably cooperative folding chair. Perhaps my own.

I also saw there is a Dance Hero Leaderboard, which is apparently a real thing. I was not aware that disco had a ranking system. This raises civic concerns about transparency in disco governance. Was there a nomination process? Could someone enter as an independent candidate? Is there a precinct captain for the boogie?

These are not complaints.

Mostly.

The serious part is that Hike Kidz Foundation is helping local children and families with basic needs, including clothing, food, shelter, support, transportation, and other resources that can make an enormous difference when a family is struggling.

I know what transportation can mean. Thirty years ago, I used to walk five miles to work. I also knew the joy of arriving at a bus stop or train station just in time to watch it leave without me. Every errand had to be planned around routes, hours, weather, and how much I could carry.

Then one day, God smiled upon me, and I had wheels.

It changed everything.

No more planning my life around bus schedules. No more limiting myself to what I could carry. No more trying to explain why I did not want to move grocery bags full of fragile and deeply personal food choices.

So when I hear that not one, but two vehicles will be given to families through Cars Changing Lives, I do not see that as a small thing. Reliable transportation affects work, school, grocery shopping, appointments, emergencies, and the basic ability to move through life without relying on the goodwill of others. A vehicle empowers an individual with a sense of independence and freedom.

That is the part worth remembering.

So yes, people should go. They should donate. They should support the teams, thank the volunteers, and help push this fundraiser as far as possible.

They should also dance.

Not because I care.

I have no personal interest in standing beneath a disco ball while grown adults rediscover confidence they should have left in a box of old photographs. I have no need to get down, boogie, hustle, or perform a movement best described as “county fair John Travolta after reading meeting minutes.”

I am past all that.

Probably.

But if there is an emergency, such as a shortage of reluctant dancers, I would consider assisting.

For the children.

Obviously.

So thank you to Sue Laurence, Hike Kidz Foundation, Jean’s Jewelers, Cars Changing Lives, and everyone helping make this event happen.

And if anyone sees me standing off to the side, arms folded, pretending not to hear the music while one foot keeps time with suspicious accuracy, please respect my privacy.

I am not waiting to be invited.

I am monitoring the disco.

For the children.

Lewis Moten
Front Royal, VA

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